It’s been a few days since I last wrote on the blog. I want to start off by thanking everyone for being so thoughtful, caring and generous. With the world being so fast moving, it is humbling that people have taken a timeout for me. The past few days from a physical side have been pretty rough. The Chemo is strong and really messes with the entire body. I feel ok one minute and then it hits me pretty hard where it is difficult to open my eyes or not feel a crazy amount of nausea. For me, keeping a positive mentality is the key to overcoming the physical effects.
I want to share a few stories from the past few days. I will start with one of my positive energies, Brandon. My son was with me the day after I discovered that I had Cancer, and handled it like a champion. He stayed positive the entire way. I know he is scared but by being part of it, I think it helped with his fears. His positive energy led to me being positive, which led to others being positive. It is viral. Good thoughts travel from one person to the next.
Right before I was to start my Chemo, which will keep me indoors for weeks, I had one last trip outside with the family. I had a couple of baseball gloves, and even though my energy was close to zero, I played catch with Brandon. It is one of our favorite things to do together. I threw the ball to Brandon and on the throw it accidentally went off his glove and hit him on the side of his head. I could see he was trying not to cry but the pain was too much and the tears came rolling down. I told him to come over and I would give him a hug. When he did, he surprised me.
I asked him if he was ok, and his response back was “you’re going to beat this dad, you’re going to beat this.” It touched my heart in the most real way. He didn’t care about his head being hit by the ball. At that moment all he was thinking about was his love for me. I will never forget that moment.
For me, it is about working through the struggles while embracing the amazing moments. That is my happiness.